The crossroads of should and must. Find and follow your passion.
Difference between a job, a career, and a calling.
A job: something typically done from 9 to 5 for pay.
A career: A system of advancements and promotions over time where rewards are used to optimize behavior.
A calling: Something that we feel compelled to do regardless of fame or fortune.
Which one do you currently have –
Or a calling?
How do we balance them all?
It’s not what an artist does that counts, but what he is. – Pablo Picasso.
Be drawn by what you really love, it will not lead you astray.
There are two paths in life: should and must. We arrive at this crossroads over and over again. And every day, we get to choose.
Should is how people want us to live our lives. It’s all of the expectations that others layer upon us. The rewards are often clear and plentiful.
Must is who we are, what we believe, and what we do when we are alone with our truest, most authentic self. Unlike Should, Must doesn’t accept compromises.
Must is when we stop conforming to other people’s ideals, and start connecting with our own – and this allows us to cultivate our full potential as individuals.
Choosing must is the greatest thing we can do with our lives.
Why don’t we choose must every day?
Should are put on us the moment we are born, to help guide us until we are able to develop our Must.
//School and everything we go through its to help us develop our inner potential.
***The path to must is a path we create. It begins in pathlessness, nothingness, emptiness.
What if I don’t know what my must is?
It takes time; step by step. Word by word.
Call your mum. What kind of childhood did you have? These stories hold the earliest seeds of your Must.
Answer questions in image
Write two different versions of your obituary – the one if your life progresses on this same path. Now consider what might be different if you heed your call.
Do something new every month. Acquire one new skill every day.
Write down your must every where you go.
Send it to someone
Attach it to a balloon
Whisper it to a bug
Write it on the bottom of your shoes
Leave it in an airplane
“A musician must make music. An artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be ultimately at peace with himself. What a man must be, he must be.” Abraham Maslow
I know what my Must is – now what?
When we discover our Must, defense mechanisms go up. Because choosing Must raises very real and scary questions.
How will I pay rent? to quit my job?
Do my ideas matter?
And so many more.
What if doing what I love doesn’t pay?
If doing what you love doesn’t pay the bills, then you must find another way to make money. Period. Being able to pay the bills can create the temporal and mental space to find your calling.
Juggle your job, career, and calling until you figure out what is right for you and your life.
How much money is enough money?
Will choosing your Must make you rich?
The wealthiest people have days and nights filled with life’s most priceless items.
Just because something is valuable doesn’t mean that we need it.
The second perceived stumbling block to Must.
***You make time for what you want.
If you’re not prioritizing the things you say you care about, consider that you don’t actually care about those things.
Do you actually know what you want?
***Spend some time digging deep and finding out what you want. Listen to your inner voice and do what it says. The more you feed it, the louder it speaks.
The more intimate we are about what we want, the more self-aware we will be about how we spend our time.
How long will you wait to honor who you are?
Vision needs solitude.
Leadership needs solitude
Because when our choices evolve from an internal place of sure footed, rooted knowing, we become resilient, emboldened, and focused.
When was the last time you were alone with yourself?
Create time to be alone – wash the dishes, take a walk alone, plant a garden, pray for 30 minutes, stay without your phone for about 30 minutes.
Choosing Must means that you have to confront some very big fears. It will make you feel vulnerable.
It is at this point that many of us decide against following our intuition, turning away from that place where nothing is guaranteed, nothing is known, and everything is possible.
To deal with this, write a What-are-you-so-afraid-of-list and examine each one of them to know if they are realistic or not. Cross out the ones that are not worth it.
If you focus the light and tighten it, the light becomes a laser beam. Focused and strong.
- Bring others in.
You may begin
To choose must requires action. You must do something. You show you’re ready by doing something – anything – regardless if it’s big or small.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Lao Tzu.
Write that idea down
Ask that question
What is one action that you can take to honor your calling – today?
The most sustainable Musts happen slowly, thoughtfully, and quietly. They don’t happen impulsively but are built with a sober, calm intention.
As you take daily action, you’ll begin to see the next steps along the path to your calling.
What if you fail?
Stop doubting and start doing.
Where does this all lead?
Grab the nearest tool. Work. And in time, you’ll know.
When you choose your calling, you inspire others to choose it, too.
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
Think of ways you will connect with others – with your work and with your life.
Start ha blog
Write an essay
Leave stories in a bus.
“I dream my painting and then I paint my dream.”